First off, apologies for waiting to write this entry until a week after the actual D-Day (deployment day) for our family work/vacation to Hawaii. Let's just say that I've spent more time in uniform while the rest of my family has been hanging out in board shorts... Anyway, I wanted to give some advice to anyone else out there pondering the insanity of flying small children across the US and then an ocean...
D-2 months (2 months before deploying) or earlier:
1. Confirm that your work is actually sending you to Hawaii.
2. Begin compiling a list of people you can bribe to come with you so you have an extra set of arms, feet, etc. on the plane ride and waiting to assist you in Hawaii.
3. Start researching where you can stay... Avoid hotels in Waikiki that don't even include a microwave in your room.
4. Purchase a blank notebook so you have enough paper to write down all the items you will need to travel with small children.
D-1 month:
1. Confirm that your work is actually sending you to Hawaii.
2. Buy Visine for your eyes. Your eyes will blur as you attempt to match up your official flight reservation and the family's flight reservation. This will require a minimum of at least four hours and two browser windows. Oh, and you'll need that extra Visine because you'll think you're seeing things when you see the cost of the government flight and the commercial flight because they're nowhere near the same... And don't even think of actually talking to an actual person to book your ticket. There's a fee for that.
3. Consider refinancing your house to pay for the airfare. A short note here: my sanity was definitely worth the $1200 cost for Owen to have his own seat.
4. Reserve place to stay. Highly recommend looking into renting a condo or house with full kitchen and at least two bedrooms. No vacation is actually a vacation if the small children stay in the room with you the entire time... That'll limit you to whispering after your kids' bedtime every night. Oh, and finding a place in Hawaii that is under the federal TDY amount that has two bedrooms during high tourist season... You might need to reserve it the previous winter.
5. Exploit your status as an active duty military member and become best friends with your ITT office. Who knew they offered vacation packages to Hawaii? Or rental car deals? Or would allow you to talk the Airman's Attic at Hickam into loaning you a pack and play for the baby so you don't have to pay for one?
6. Order copies of your children's birth certificate if you don't have them already. Despite the fact that my infant (!) does not look anywhere near the age of 2 (unless of course you have a ticket agent with ZERO experience with small children and blurs all children under the age of 18 together...), you may still be asked to produce evidence they can travel for free on your lap.
7. Talk to your pediatrician for a drug recommendation for your child. Pick up said drug and test. Hope your child is not in the 25% that actually become more hyper on cold medicine.
D-2 weeks:
1. Confirm that your work is actually sending you to Hawaii.
2. Begin researching your airline's baggage policy as you figure out what you can bring with you. Exploit your status as an active duty military member. For example, as active duty traveling on orders on United, I could check up to 5 bags weighing up to 70 lbs a piece. Oh, and car seats and strollers do not count against your baggage count. You'll need every free checked bag you can get.
D-1 week:
1. Confirm that your work is actually sending you to Hawaii. True story, the week before I was scheduled to leave, there was a decent possibility the trip was going to be cancelled. I nearly had a heart attack.
2. Print off copies of everything: flight itinerary, rental car reservations, baggage policies, TSA policy, directions to where you're staying... Oh, and any actual work related items you might need. Oh, and thanks to the US government, the TSA allows you to carry juice for your toddler through security but not cow milk... Huh?
3. Stockpile enough snacks and food to get you through a day's worth of traveling or a category 2 hurricane, whatever may come first. On an 8 hour flight, we were offered zero food for free. And I could only feel sorry for the little girl who begged her dad incessantly for a $30 (!) cheese plate.
4. Pack your bags. Let the neighbors think you're moving out with the amount of luggage piled up in the hallway. Make sure to mark your bags with crazy ribbon to distinguish them from everyone else's. And definitely distribute everything you may need throughout bags.
D-1:
1. Confirm that your work is actually sending you to Hawaii.
2. Dress kids in clothes they will travel in so when you wake up at 0230 in the morning for a 0600 flight departure, at least one of you will sleep.
3. Give your kids a bath too so they will smell nice, giving the people around you one less thing to complain about, and so that they will have bedhead.
This is just a quick overview of the amount of work that went into planning for this trip. The actual planning took a lot more stress and heartache than actually can be pushed through a blog.
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